Wednesday, September 28, 2005

You say tomato...I say to-mato

412 miles logged on my current sneaker. Almost time to buy a new pair, according to the Nike website. They actually recommend you replace every two weeks, but I think my range is within safe bounds. I always wince with remembrance when I walk into a sportshop for sneaks, because invariably I flash back to...

...self-consciously walking into the runner's section of a 'serious' sports store. I had just picked up running, and was going to upgrade my footwear. I didn't want to sound like a total newbie, so I had researched all the Key Words and In The Know Jargon and was rehearsing them in my head. I found a store advisor, a very fit-looking woman with slabs of granite where calves usually go. I changed my walk to a light swagger, and delivered my well-rehearsed script.

"Hey there, can you help me?"

"Sure, you looking for something?"

"I sure am. I've been running with, uh...(look quickly around and pick the first brand that pops into view) Asics all my life, but wanted to see what else's out there."

"Sir, you came to the right place! What's your gait look like?"

"(aha! key word!) Yeah, I've been told that I...over-prostate"

{moment of silence}

"..beg your pardon?"

"Y'know, over-prostate. The longer I go, the more it starts to hurt."

"...hmm. Sir, I dunno how to put it, but sneakers won't help you with that problem."

At this point, I'm thinking, oh great, a new hire. She doesn't know the terminology.

"{sigh} ok then, I guess I'll try elsewhere"

"You do that sir."

Later that day, I Google Runner's World for the sneaker reviews. To my dismay, the correct word I should have used was "Over-pronate."


Marika said...

This is hilarious!! Thanks for a good laugh. I think everyone's been there. I had a conversation with my boss the other day and he was talking about a friend of his who holds the Australian record for rod-caught Spanish Makerel. I laughed politely then asked..."Who's Rod Caught?"

Saira said...

I'm still laughing : )


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