You're a Really Useful Engine!

Today is the Big Move. All of our furniture is in the old place, so we've been doing the camp thing at our new pad for the past two weeks. Spending the night in sleeping bags and using two upside-down boxes for dining tables is fun for, maybe 2 hours, tops. And those two hours are daylight two hours - stumbling around after dark is no picnic. Primitive cavemen would have discovered fire much sooner if they had flipped the light switch and found the matches in the top drawer. Fossil records and cave drawings confirm this. Be that as it may....Finally, we are about to be welcomed back to civilization. Beds, lights, chairs!

But first, a bit of awkward purgatory.

The movers are here now, doing their moving thing, but I don't quite know what I should be doing. Do I help? No...that's why I hired them. Do I make idle chatter, despite the fact that I despise it when folks do that to me when I'm busy? So I shamble aimlessly from room to room, and end up in the garage. And here is where I type away on my Treo.

Who Knew?

Am I the only one in the room that doesn't know that Laura Mercier is a cosmetic? Was it so dumb a question for me to ask, "Is she the new intern?"

Gotta be better than "Ice Age 2"

I find these Disney ice shows pretty annoying. Don't get me wrong, the kids and I really enjoyed watching the original Pixar film. Again and again and again. I can even recite Mr. Ray, the Manta Ray's little ditty as he sails across the ocean floor.

However, this..this..ice thing is where I draw the line. Let me see..former runner-up Olympians and former hockey players + stuffed animal costumes = pure family fun! Put them on skates and it's so much rapture that it should be used only for medicinal purposes!

Wait, why not take it one step further? Let's re-adapt the concept and do a live-action Nemo film!! We can call it:

"Disney on Ice presents. Finding Nemo: the Movie"

movin' movin' movin', keep them puppies rollin'

We spent the weekend doing a gradual move into our new place. Gradual, because we only moved like 5 miles down the street, and we still haven't sold the old place yet. No time pressure, but still a ton to do.

The young'uns, 6 and 3, had to entertain themselves for most of the day while we painted, cleaned, trimmed, fixed, and collapesed in an exhausted heap.

Here's a partial list of Fun Games for Kids to Play while Parents are Doing Moving Chores:

- Let's Test Daddy's Fuse
- Who Can Push Mommy's Buttons the Fastest
- Don't Touch the Wet Paint Means Go Ahead
- Fingerprint art competition on DVDs
- Hide and Forget -- challenging fun with Tools and Car keys

Reese's Peanut Butter Cups

(stroking material, walking down the hall oblivious to surroundings)
Ah, my beautiful Coach leather briefcase. Why, it's simply a unique synthesis of magic and logic that stands for quality, authenticity, value and a truly aspirational, distinctive American style.


(carressing the contoured plastic case, also walking down the hall but not paying attention)
Oh, the wonders of my In Focus -- best-in-class capabilities with intuitive controls. Talk about outstanding color saturation and brightness that lasts!

CRASH!

Hey your fine-grained leather...
...in my multimedia projector!

Two great tastes that taste great together. Now featuring the new Coach In Focus projector! Someone brought one of these into a meeting yesterday. Despite the obvious synergy involved in such logical brand extentions, it appears that both Coach and InFocus have discontined their partnership. Misunderstood genius probably. But fret not! I hear that Coach is now trying to fill the void that Disney left when the rodent cartoon company announced its plans to end the tie-in with McDonald's Happy Meals! Imagine -- Double Quarter Pounder with enviro-friendly leather to-go bag.

Ain't that the truth

"Some people change when they see the light, others when that light starts to burn 'em on their arse."

- from a crotchety sales manager I used to work for. I think he added his own color to an existing one, but I still find this phrase to be a valid one...

Read Between the Lines

Ever notice how some people can speak volumes without really conveying anything?

Here's a reply to a question that was asked on a conference call this morning:

"I think we should leverage our organizational strengths to put more wood behind the arrow and to set up a cross-functional virtual team to study how we can better divide and conquer."

Translation:

"I was doing email and didn't hear your question."