Thursday, August 11, 2005


Besieged by ants. Ants all over the place. Lines and lines and lines of these insects, marching along with purpose. I tried spraying, but that didn't work too well. It killed the buggers that I hit directly, but an hour later, they're back again. Worse yet, each of the afflicted soldiers do a little Platoon/William Dafoe; arching back and raising its antennae in supplication to the cruel and remorseless fates. Much as I dislike these guys, I feel a bit...guilty. The ant baits fare just as poorly. The ants just walk over the plastic Raid containers, and keep walking toward tastier morsels. As befitting this nuevo-riche snob neighborhood (*lest there be any confusion, those communities are a half a mile up the hill from here. My place is where the help for the snob neighborhood live. But amongst pool cleaners and gardeners, we are considered snobby pool cleaners and gardeners), the ants have very jaded palettes. That Raid bait is a 2006 March from the Minneapolis region, terrible batch. The 2004 Texas is to die for!

Why can't we come to a compromise? I would be totally willing to set aside a plate of goodies at a mutually satisfactory location, say, right outside the garage. The ants will have guaranteed, wholesome foods (well as wholesome as the food I eat anyway), as long as they do not enter the demark of the garage door. Sort of a DMZ if you will. Alas, the talks have fallen apart again. The battle and the war rages on....


harumi said...


Wubert said...

I tried bargaining with ants once and had no luck whatsoever. Their union is too strong, too demanding. I made a big mistake and tried to bluff them out of a half-eaten Snickers. That was when I found out those mandibles aren't just for show.


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